the thursday thirty, issue one.

30 most-played songs on my beloved ipod:
1. as if // sara evans
2. vancouver // reckless kelly
3. from the inside out // hillsong united
4. love must follow you around // randy rogers band
5. nobody's girl // reckless kelly
6. kiss me in the dark // randy rogers band
7. before i believe it's true // randy rogers band [noticing a trend here?]
8. wicked twisted road // reckless kelly
9. all-american girl // carrie underwood
10. get out of this town //carrie underwood
11. so small // carrie underwood
12. flat on the floor // carrie underwood
13. wake up older // julie roberts
14. crazy dreams // carrie underwood
15. over you // daughtry
16. i bless you // dennis jernigan & christy nockles
17. the toast // no justice
18. just a matter of time // randy rogers band
19. snowfall // reckless kelly
20. one more goodbye // randy rogers band
21. twisted // carrie underwood
22. you don't want me around // reckless kelly
23. desolation angels // reckless kelly
24. finally free // nichole nordeman
25. you're not sorry // taylor swift
26. the more boys i meet // carrie underwood
27. so close now // eli young band
28. out in the fields // mike mcclure band
29. someday // nichole nordeman
30. finder's keepers // pat green

wow, there's way more red dirt and country music on here than i thought there'd be! what does your music selection usually consist of?

phone-a-thon adventures.

while taking a fast-paced world religions course this month during j-term, i also have ventured into the world of telephone solicitation. oh yes, friends, i have become one of those. here at oklahoma baptist university, we use our j-term phone-a-thon to raise moolah for the school's general scholarship/material/random need fund. in my little cubicle, i dial alumni and friends from across the nation, tactfully and cheerfully reciting the same little phrases. this mundane process has proved to be surprisingly eye-opening, and dare i say even a wee bit enjoyable. we win coveted packets of shawnee mills mixes and sonic coupons by playing hangman and trivia games, and the competition for most pledges per evening is quite fierce. there are even cookies and sweet tea provided for us every night, which makes this endeavor oh so worthwhile. :] it never fails, however, that i get a few alumni on the other end of the telephone who choose the following reactions:

#1: the "nobody-can-hear-me-through-the-phone" alumni
"hello?"
"hi! may i speak to joe schmo?"
"who is this?"
"my name is taylor phillips and i'm a student calling from oklahoma baptist university."
"hold on." .... a whispered conversation will take place, in which one spouse tells the other obu is on the phone. he/she will then respond with, "they're just lookin' for money. hang up."
....
"he's not here."
click.

#2: the former donor who just raises my hopes too high
"hello?"
"hi! may i speak to joe schmo?"
"speaking."
"hello, my name is taylor phillips and i'm a student calling from oklahoma baptist university. how are you this evening?
"fine."
"great! if you have just a moment, i'd like to speak with you about the obu fund, which i see you have donated $1,000 to in the past five years. would you consider making another gift this year?"
"nah, i think we'll pass this year. but thanks!"
click.

#3: the "i'm-too-busy-to-talk...but-i-still-answered-my-phone" alumni
[sigh] "hello?"
"hi! may i speak with blah blah?"
"this is she."
"hello, my name is blah blah blah. how are you this evening?"
"pretty good. you?"
"great, thank you for asking! i'm calling on behalf of the obu fund. do you have just a minute to talk about that?"
"oh. ... actually, i'm putting my kids to bed."
click.

#4: the "i'm-angry-you're-interrupting-american-idol" alumni
"yeah?"
"hi! may i speak with blah blah blah."
"just a sec."
"hello?"
"hi, my name is blah blah blah. how are you?"
"good."
"great! i'm calling on behalf of the obu fund. do you have just a minute to speak with me about it?"
"no, thank you. why are you calling on the american idol premier night?!"
click.

#5: the "i-think-obu-sucks-now" alumni
[insert usual introduction here]
"honey, i will never give to obu, and i'd be glad to tell you why."
"alri-"
"i was a missionary with the southern baptist convention for 33 years, and i was fired after all that time for not signing the baptist faith and message because it's oppressive to women. as long as obu is supported by the sbc, i cannot give with a clean conscience. are you a missions major?"
"um, yes actually."
"oh dear. sweetheart, you gotta make some decisions early on."

friends, these are just some of the many conversations i've had in the last two weeks. don't be fooled, not all of my phone-a-thon nights have been this negative. i have been blessed with many wonderful conversations and lots of coupons and cornbread. :] but these adventures in phone calls have prompted me to ponder my past and future reactions to telemarketers or my gift-seeking alma mater. i now know how frustrating it can be to be hung up on, and to go through scores of alumni and not have one pleasant exchange [bear in mind they all graduated from a christian university...]. i sure hope this lesson in patience has also taught me to remember these very phone-a-thon adventures when i myself am called up by a poor college student who's just doing their job.
so what about y'all? have you ever taken a job as a phone-caller or been on the receiving end of a telemarketer? how did you react in various situations?

you're the God of this city.

today at church we sang one of my absolute favorite songs, God of this city. it was all i could do to keep from letting the happy tears flow [though they definitely let loose later in the message - invasions has been an incredible series!] as i thought of so many places the lyrics remind me of - my hometown of mountain view, my college abode in shawnee, the edmond/oklahoma city communities i've invested in these last two years, and istanbul. this city captured my heart in just two short weeks back in 2005. my vision is there, my dreams are with the turks, and a little piece of me remained there as our plane took off of the soil. as i copy and paste these lyrics, let me also leave with you one of my favorite photographs from that trip. my former youth minister's wife peeked her camera around the corner of this tiny street in an instanbul neighborhood and snapped a precious piece of time as we prayerwalked. He is the God of this city, and such bigger things than we can envision are already in preparation - for istanbul, for oklahoma city, for your hometown and mine. let's join in and be a part of what He's doing.

You're the God of this city

You're the King of these people

You're the Lord of this nation

You are

You're the Light in this darkness

You're the Hope to the hopeless

You're the Peace to the restless

You are

there is no one like our God

there is no one like our God

for greater things have yet to come

and greater things are still to be done in this city

greater things are still to come

and greater things are still to be done in this city

what's next.

this past year brought me new responsibilities that i never expected to come my way so soon. one of these is a position as the what's next coordinator for switch at the edmond campus of lifechurch.tv, where i have the opportunity to disciple new believers and follow up with them on their spiritual journey. discipleship is something i am deeply passionate about, especially when it comes to the youth i work with. it is so amazing to be a tiny part in raising up a biblically literate and spiritually mature group of kids! in the last two months at switch, He has allowed me to become close with a group of several high school girls who are all close friends themselves. they approached me together one week after switch to talk about recommitting their lives to following Christ, and He has opened up a great line of communication between us since. each girl has been faithfully attending church on the weekends and wednesday evenings, and their excitement at discovering new verses that are relevant to whatever they're experiencing at a given time is so delightful to witness! last night at switch, one of the girls expressed an interest in getting more involved at the church and finding a place to serve there. i was able to get her into contact with coordinators from lifekids, and i'm excited to see where this leads her! to me, this is such a demonstration of her growth in the last several months. one of the biggest fruits of faith is service to others in His name, and i cannot tell you how warm and fuzzy it makes me to get to see that emerge from behind the scenes. =)

the farewell tour.

okay addison, i'm copying some of your creativity today! slipping into another january is always an exciting, unknown moment. and, being my retrospective self, i'd like to pass along a few things that made this year what it was. i have a whole new appreciation for the past twelve months after looking back at this list. =)

• began my second semester of college with a break-up i thought would surely kill me
• took my first class in the honors program at obu
• maintained a 4.0
• initiated my last year as an official teen in february
• experienced further heartbreak from my first love
• attended the memorial service of his precious little cousin on my birthday
• realized i had the most loving and supportive friends and family [once again] as a result of my darkest hour
• spent priceless weekends with family who had been on the west coast for far too long :]
• had a good ole red dirt night at a randy rogers band concert with my best hometown friends
• initiated into the phi eta sigma national honor society
• continued serving with switch at lifechurch.tv and discovered amazing ministry opportunities
• went on a mission trip to eureka springs with my switch kids
• helped construct a kickin' gravel driveway on said mission trip =)
• drove to phoenix with my sister, niece, and mom, and watched my sweet cousin marry his soulmate under palm trees
• got published in the bison
• played on a few slot machines with my mom and her best friend from college, hehehe
• experienced a medical scare that tested me financially and spiritually
• watched my brother successfully run his second full marathon - complete with hand-painted signs and loud cheers at almost every mile marker =)
• received scholarships that were blissfully unexpected
• watched a dear friend from back home graduate and accomplish great things
• craved an apology which i was sure would fix everything
• served as a team leader for the first time at super summer
• received the apology i had been craving, and remained unsatisfied
• lived in edmond for a summer
• became a member of the lifechurch.tv prayer team
• saw another close friend marry the sweetest girl in all of texas
• worked at a new place may through august and met splendid new people
• began doing on-stage activities at switch
• witnessed the greatest fireworks show of my life on independence day
• served as a sponsor for the first time at falls creek
• went to the mountain view-gotebo free fair and saw many old friends
• started serving at fuse
• began my third semester of college
• caught the domestic bug
• started teaching conversation classes with the international students at obu
• became the switch what's next coordinator
• began a new job at the wellness center
• went on a retreat with sweet friends and opened up my heart
• participated in my first race for the cure with my family
• spent fall break with my mom on a girls' trip to branson
• published in the bison again
• voted in my first presidential election
• learned how to play texas-hold-'em
• learned my sister is pregnant again!
• survived my first semester of western civ with an a
• realized i won't find happiness if i won't let go
• rekindled an old, dear friendship
• wrote a blues song =)
• learned a few french phrases
• maintained a 4.0 again
• discovered a love for the food network
• played the heck out of hungry hungry hippos with my precious nieces

queen-sized love.

my sister's beautiful, gargantuan home in edmond allows me to call a queen sized bed my own for breaks and weekends - and boy, was i relishing it last night, y'all. at 10:45, after soundly slumbering for almost one precious hour, i hear my bedroom door softly open.
"peanut?
"yes?"
"i need to go potty. and i need new panties and pajamas. will you take me to the potty and tuck me back in?"
a slight groan from my cozy spot emerges. "okay, babe."
kaitlyn and i head to her jungle-themed bathroom, take care of business, and retrieve fresh pj's and dora undies from the dresser.
"can bob sleep in my bed tonight too?"
"sure thing."
bob, a soft and oversized easter bunny, joins kaitlyn under the flannel covers and gets tucked in as well. kisses and many requests to play duck-duck-goose in the morning ensue - from kaitlyn, of course. not bob. anyway, with a successful retucking under my belt, i return to a warm doze. and at 10:55, i hear my bedroom door softly open once again.
"peanut?"
"yes?"
"i can't sleep. and bob is making it where i can't sleep."
"do you want to snuggle with me tonight?
"yes."
"climb in, babe."
my own miniature spooning partner makes herself at home in the small of my back, and throughout the night proceeds to slowly push me out of my once seemingly big bed. as the early morning rolls in and sunlight begins to peak through the wooden blinds, my niece begins to wiggle around and demonstrate her awakenness.
"i love you so much, peanut."
and that, my friends, makes an evening of hanging off the side of a bed with a three-year-old ensuring your position there all worth it. :]

on prayer, fear, and love that won't let go.

i have so much to say and so little ability with which to articulate it all. amidst a busy weekend of studying for what just might be the death of me, a welcomed break came in the form of such a familiar routine today: church. [i know, routine is such an awful word to describe the assembly of His body, but don't you agree that at times we allow it to get that way? i'll add that to an ever-growing list of things to erradicate for 2009.] i love my church and have invested alot of time and effort into the goings-on there that i am passionate about. this particular morning evoked such a tidal wave of emotions that i certainly was not expecting, and i fear that if i do not take the time to record it all, it will soon become just another sunday that i pack away into a box. so, here goes.
the worship set was gorgeous-as always-with an unplugged version of some of my favorite christmas songs. i had almost forgotten this was the weekend for child dedications, though, and as the first noel began its first few chords, couples began assembling on the stage with their precious babies and toddlers in tow. the entire concept of dedicating one's life to raising his or her child in the ways of God and making that commitment publically is so radically wonderful. i couldn't stop smiling at the sweet baby girl who looked in kelly and i's direction as her mom bounced her softly, and i almost thought happy tears were going to flow if i didn't swallow that lump in my throat. but then i felt a twinge of sadness, envy even. i stared at all of the beautiful couples and their perfect gifts and wondered if i would ever get to stand in their shoes. this is a fear which plagues me almost daily, in which i picture myself perpetually unwed and, as surely will follow, alone. my joy for my siblings' and friends' families sometimes turns to an embarassing, private jealousy and sorrow for what i fear i may never get to experience.
the message, i then thought, would surely take my mind off of this little fear. we started our second week of a phenomenal series on prayer, and as i began circling the verses we referenced, God peeled back my blinders to new truths i needed to understand. craig told us that our relationships with others have a huge impact on our prayer life. simple, right? but i, presumed to be semi-mature in the realm of spiritual things, never before considered how my grudges effect my communication with God. mark 11:25 says, "but when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too." oh brother. so this means i have to let go of the things he did and said that continue to cause my heart so much hurt? will You empower me to release my bitterness for this heartache and forgive him? my mind raced and was, at the same time, filled with peace. the next part of the message led us to proverbs, where He confronted me with a verse that wasn't even part of our study! proverbs 16:1 spoke directly to the fear i let steal my joy earlier during worship: "we can make our own plans, but the Lord gives the right answer." my plans of marriage and motherhood may or may not be in His framework for my life, and ultimately it is His answer to that prayer that is right. oh brother againnnnn.
next came fuse, the fifth and sixth grade ministry i and my college friends serve with after our own church experience. what was the message in there about? fear. that's right. triple whammy. at the conclusion of the video teaching, brian asked if we would allow our fear to keep us from experiencing the adventures of life that are right before us. no, i thought, no they won't. i still strongly desire to fall in love again and have it last forever, to bring children into a home of faith and love. but i also have to accept that whether or not that falls in line with God's plan for my life, i will be okay.
so, while i may have a few tears in the shower tonight, i will eventually wipe them away and remember that God did not give me a spirit of fear or timidity. i will try my darndest to play with and love on my nieces without pausing to remind myself that i may never have a daughter of my own. i will go to my friends' beautiful weddings and not feel heavy-hearted at the possibility i may never wear that dress. i will remember that i have an amazing circle of family and dear friends who give me constant laughter, and a future that will likely bring me more adventure than i can fathom now. and i will realize that the greatest Love of all has been mine all along.